About You

“It is my hope for you that you can learn from the information on this website about the process of change and how it can enhance your life.”

Disillusionment
Common Solutions
A Different Solution
Focus Areas

                                                              Disillusionment
   
Thinking about your life, you might want to go back to some happier times when things were a little less complicated.  Every choice you make leads to more choices.  Because of the progressive nature of our culture, more often than not you might find yourself caught up in the rat race, every day getting back on the treadmill and hoping for any opportunity for escape. Or, you might be tempted to give up, resigned to a life of quiet desperation.  Perhaps you can see yourself somewhere in between these two extremes and want to avoid the feeling of overwhelm when life starts to get out of balance.  Wanting inner peace and contentment along with the satisfaction of having solid, healthy relationships can be harder to come by than you might think.

                                                            Common Solutions

Common solutions to overcoming the feeling of overwhelm is to engage in various addictions such as some of the “soft additions” like excessive shopping or watching too much TV.  Then there are the more obvious “hard” addictions like gambling or engaging in alcohol and/or drugs.  (You can identify addictions by looking at how they might be hindering your life in some way.)  There is also the strategy of setting higher and higher goals, hoping that attaining them will bring ultimate satisfaction.  Many people attempt to find happiness within significant relationships, which is an admirable thing.  But, over-dependency can cause dissention, just as not being honest and “real” with others can create tension within a relationship.  What I have found to be true is that these solutions keep people from being connected to themselves and is the true cause of unhappiness.

                                                          A  Different Solution

Because the quality of significant relationships is important, learning about them is necessary for our happiness.   As I talk to disillusioned people, what often emerges is that what they are really missing is a deep connection with themselves.  As we grow and mature, we forget about what we deeply care about and value, accepting what others deem important, following goals sanctified by society and blindly conforming to family patterns of relating that might be the opposite of what we really want.  We can also lose ourselves when we experience either big or small traumas in the course of our lives.

  • You can change your self-talk by identifying faulty thinking like, “Why am I such a failure?” or “Why do certain people or situations frustrate me?” to “How can I do this differently?” and “What can I learn from this?”  Feeling victimized can leave you feeling stuck in feelings of anger and blame.
  • You can learn how to reconnect to your true self by thinking about what your desires are and how they can guide you into your life purpose.
  • You can learn how to assess your personality, appreciate your uniqueness and find your distinctive voice in the world.

Entering into a professional helping relationship that is looking more at what is right with you than what is wrong can help you to correct weaknesses and build on your strengths.  I invite you to consider the option of counseling and to spend some time deciding whether you would be served best in a therapeutic or in a coaching relationship.


Individual Psychotherapy

Talking about what is going on within you is powerful medicine.  Exploring your past experiences and family relationships can help you gain insight into a deeper understanding of yourself by getting to the root of your thinking.  Processing feelings and releasing past traumas helps to identify underlying beliefs so that change begins to occur.

Relationship Counseling

I believe it is necessary to get to know and accept yourself before you can enter into a healthy relationship.  Having a sense of connection to what you believe and value is the basis of sharing what is on your heart in a way that is both understood and received. Find out who you are instead of who everyone wants you to be.    Holding space for people to talk and expressing yourself from a more compassionate place are communication skills necessary for long-term happiness. 

Spiritual Exploration

In our fast-paced society, our human hearts can grow blind and numb to the truth of God’s presence in our lives.  It takes time and a special effort to see how you may have developed “protective” measures to live life independent of God and to consider deeper questions as to why God doesn’t always intervene.  Discover how much potential you have within you to love and to be loved and to find the resources to follow your dreams and make your life count.   
   
Health, Wellness and Weight Loss
 
Finding the motivation to make good nutrition and exercise a priority, thereby finding your natural weight, is one of life’s more challenging issues.  What I have found is that having more time for self-care activities is less about time management and more about knowing who you are so that you can make better decisions regarding what to include in your life.  Changing one’s lifestyle is a comprehensive task.  I adhere to the adage:  “Small steps taken consistently over a long period of time produce results.”

Motivation and Change

Participate in my women’s Radical Self-Care small group, which offers a place to stop and identify what kinds of attitudes and activities nourish you.  What used to be considered leisure time activities become important priorities in your “busier than ever” life as you protect your body from burnout and begin to find more energy and motivation to live each new day with intention.

Invisible Illnesses

My journey with Chronic Lyme Disease, one of many invisible illnesses, allows me to draw upon my own experience and the path I chose to experience healing.  Invisible illnesses require a great deal of support as the individual struggling to feel better usually looks good on the outside.  I attempt to create a “circle of care” around individuals with similar struggles where awareness can be developed about different ways to heal and empathy can be both given and received in an environment of safety and professional care.
                                          
For further understanding of how hiring a professional can help you, read articles on how people naturally change, the differences between therapy and coaching and some testimonials of others who have entered into the process.  Send in a question, if you like, having to do with what might come up for you as you explore the possibility of change.